The idea of falling in love and having that feeling reciprocated is often thrilling. After the excitement, one must work to keep the relationship going. It is sometimes a sacrifice in which patience, and understanding must be drawn. With this knowledge, we can refer to the available resources that speak on love and relationships. ‘The Five Love Languages’ book by Dr. Gary Chapman is a popular book discussing love beyond a feeling but as a language that needs to be understood.
We all have a love language that makes us or our partners feel loved. If the language is not understood, conflicts, dissatisfaction, and withdrawal from your partner occur. As highlighted by the book, these five languages include:
- Words of affirmation
- Gifts
- Acts of service
- Physical touch
- Quality time
Though these languages are good to know, implementing them is different. They can be actualized through:
- Appreciating your spouse by learning to say thank you
- Pointing out your partner’s strengths
- Not belittling your spouse or shouting at them in public
- Acknowledging them by introducing them properly
- Demanding that your friends and family respect your wife/husband
- Getting them thoughtful gifts
- Listening to their needs
- Helping out in house chores or running errands
- Serving them before serving other people
- Giving them a massage
- Hugging and cuddling
- Regularly checking on your spouse by giving them a call or sending a text in the middle of the day
- Maintaining healthy boundaries
- Doing activities together
- Turning down outsiders who tend to flirt with you and instead, woo your partner
- Showing up at your spouse’s events
- Making it clear that you will consult your significant other in case an offer or request is made
- Prioritize each other
- Intimacy. Sex is important but before physical intimacy, connect on other intimacy levels like spiritually, emotionally, and financially
- Praying for them
These are but a few ways of expressing love to your husband or wife. Whatever sits well with your partner should be cultivated and that which is non-beneficial weeded out. A point to remember is that we are walking banks. Instead of regularly withdrawing from our partners’ banks by doing what displeases them, we ought to deposit by loving them in the best way possible.
Love has a language. What’s yours? And how are you cultivating it daily with the love of your life? If you don’t know, take this free quiz https://www.5lovelanguages.com/
